Tantra For Beginners

If you’d like to take your sex life to a higher plane, you might want to consider introducing some tantric techniques to your lovemaking. This is a way to control and manipulate your sexual energy, including exchanging energy with your partner and prolonging orgasm.

Tantra is more than just a way to more intense orgasm, however. It’s an Eastern practice that involves the whole mind, body and soul. You may want to extend the practise out of the bedroom, as Tantra includes techniques that can affect your whole way of life. By harnessing your sexual energy and directing it towards areas of the body or mind, you can boost energy and clear blockages. Tantric practise also means treating your body and your partner’s body as sacred. Sexual ecstasy is seen as a divine feeling and love making as an art that involves special skills.

Breathing
Probably the most fundamental practical aspect of Tantric sex is breathing practise. This might mean controlling your breathing during sex to bring your attention back to the present, or synchronising your breath with your lover’s. Breathing in time with your partner can lead to a feeling of merging or union that is very intimate and moving. Yoga and meditation teach breathing exercises that can be incorporated into your Tantric sessions, try focussing on a slow, long out breath to control your breathing, coupled with deep breaths from your diaphragm. While you breath in this manner, bring your attention to your partner and their breathing.

Positions
Tantra is not about turning sex into a marathon of a hundred different positions, but the Kama Sutra does form part of the teachings of Tantra. Working your way through every position is not part of the plan, though. Sexual positions are to be explored, and for the most part you’re looking for ways to prolong your lovemaking. Multiple orgasms for both man and woman are part of the fun, for him this means learning to orgasm without ejaculation. This means he needs to learn to control the muscle at the base or ‘root’ of his penis. Women can improve their orgasmic potential by contracting their pelvic floor muscles, try clenching as though holding in a pee, then releasing. Do this for cycles of around 10 seconds at a time, every time you remember.

The most important aspects of Tantra are to respect yourself and your partner. Rather than seeing sex as a ‘naughty’ or secret activity, devotees are encouraged to focus on the sacred and spiritual aspects of lovemaking. Ultimately, there is no one clear definition of Tantra as every follower has his or her own interpretation. For those who practise Tantric sex, the experience is one of constant discovery. You too will come to have your own understanding of the meaning of Tantra the more you practise the simple techniques of slowing down, paying attention and giving respect to the act of sex.

How to Do the 69 Position

Here are some hints on how to get started:

* For the 69 position to work, both partners have to be lying upside down, head to toe. There are 2 main positions. The first is with one person lying on their back and the partner on top so you are both facing each others genitals. The person on top uses their elbows to hold the weight of their body as they perform oral sex to their partner. The other common position is with both partners lying on your side. The benefit of this position is you can rest your heads on each other’s thighs..comfy!

* Once you are comfortable, it’s time to get started. One of the hardest things about mutual oral sex is sometimes it is hard to concentrate on giving oral sex when you are receiving it. The pleasure is that strong that you lose focus on what you are doing to your partner. Especially if you are new to this position and you are not used to giving and receiving, then you can take it in turns of pleasing one another. You don’t necessarily have to be pleasing each other at the same time, you can work your way up to this.

* If you are in this situation and not used to giving and receiving, then using sex toys can help you. If you are going to take it in turn of giving, then using sex toys is great so your partner is still receiving pleasure. For girls, vibrators are a great toy. The famous iVibe Rabbit is great to play with. This product will keep her pleased and aroused while she concentrates on the licking. Fingering her is also a great way to keep her aroused. The Adam & Eve 5X Finger Vibe With 4 PleasureSkin Sleeves is fantastic. With these finger sleeves, you can keep her aroused and excited as she pleases you.

* Sex toys that are great to use on guys are anal beads and butt plugs. Play with him as he is concentrating on the licking. The Dr Joel Prostate Massager is fantastic as it reaches the male prostate zone. The Joy Toy 9" Vibrating Beaded Butt Plug Purple is also a great toy to play with. The toys are great as it means they are still receiving pleasure while they give it to you.

* Even better, when you have got used to mutual satisfaction, then keep using the toys in conjunction with your mouth – this adds extra pleasure.

* Remember to communicate with your partner when you are in the 69 position. Listen for moans and groans to find out where they like the attention the most. If you are not sure, ask. Some girls like all the attention on the clitoris, whereas others like it all around the vaginal area, and with some attention paid to their butt. Guys sometimes like all attention on their penis, others like it all over including on the balls. Make sure that you and your partner are making the most of the 69 position by asking and experimenting with what you like.

* Take it in turns of who is on top and who is on the bottom. For some girls they prefer to be on the top as they can control where they want the focus to be. They can maneuver themselves so your tongue is focused where they want it.

* Other little toys like the Feather Tickler and massage oil like the Tantric Oil Shakti Bottle add spice to the 69er. Massage your partner while licking, or tickle your partner to add some extra fun.

* Remember, the 69 position is about both partners. While at the start it is hard to concentrate on giving while receiving, you will get used to it and love that both of you are in ecstasy at the same time.

* There are other positions to try…these are a couple of common ones to get started.